Ok fellow addicts (you know who you are) I have a new dealer for you.  Travel shows. What you say?  I thought those were for professionals?  Me too, one of the reasons I keep pretending to be professional.  I just spent a blissful day at the NY Times Travel Show and was surprised to find myself surrounded my like minded travel fanatics all getting high from the smell of crepes and the sound of mariachi music.

Pauline and Arthur Frommer with little old me!!!

Why you should go: You’ll find information on places you’ve never thought of going, Galapagos Islands?  Curacao anyone?  NY had over 500 destinations, cruises, tours, adventures and travel services represented.  You could win free trips.  They have nutella crepes (ok, maybe not all of them, but NYC did, and it made my day).   They have great seminars and amazing speakers, I met my travel heroes Arthur and Pauline Frommer.

If exclusive deals, the ability to book a trip on the spot (thank you Amex) aren’t enough…how about some cute cowboys from Mexico?

Hola Caballeros

I hope they didn’t feel objectified by my middle aged ogling, actually a little bit of mexican beefcake just might lure me down south for our next get away!

So check out the next travel show in your area and even if you can’t really get away, you can pretend for the day.

Ever wonder when you “sponsor a child” if that child really exists?  Really benefits from your donation?  JJ and I were lucky enough to find out personally.  Our first outing in Rwanda, was to the World Vision office in Nyarutovu.  My friend Lesley and her 2 children Grace and Liam traveled with us and this would be Lesley’s second time meeting the children she sponsors.  Quite impressively her little church sponsors hundreds of children in this one little village.

JJ and our sponsored child Ancille

I wasn’t sure what to expect on our arrival, as I’m sure the children we were meeting weren’t sure either.  The outpost of WorldVision services families as many as 30 miles away from the local office.  In fact most of the families we met this day had walked several miles just to meet us, to say it was humbling would be an understatement.  When we arrived the children were gathered looking both tense and excited in what were most likely their best clothes yet still heartbreakingly tattered.

We shared no common language, there was no way to understand each other still JJ and Ancille managed to quickly bond.  All of the children gathered around us and sang and danced a fabulous song.  I have no idea what it was, we tried to return the favor and sing for them and were seriously embarrassed to realize we couldn’t even remember the second verse of “Jesus Loves Me”, thankfully they didn’t seem to notice.  We  brought bags and bags of clothes, toys and gifts for not only our children but their extended families as well.  What brought us to tears was that some of the parents had brought gifts for us.  Though they live without electricity or running water, they were thoughtful enough to bring gifts.  There aren’t words for how we felt.

The day before we came to visit we spent the day shopping in the local market.  We realized we had brought western style clothes for the mothers of our sponsored children yet all of the women wore traditional african styled fabrics.  We thought it would be a more thoughtful gift to provide each mom with several yards of cloth that they could do with as they wished.  The trip to the market was a lesson in local customs.

Though I asked each person before I took their photo, there were a few people who didn’t appreciate my snapping pictures, am not sure if they felt I was being a voyeur or if they thought I was rude.

Sweet baby

Luckily this sweet woman with her baby on her back (wish I could still carry my babies like that) defended me.  At least I think she did, they left me alone.  I always feel it’s so important to ask before photographing people, especially when it includes their children.  It’s important to me to treat each person with dignity when choosing to take their photo.  Later in our trip it became my “magic trick” that helped me to bond with mothers and children alike.  So few of them have access to photos of themselves (or often even mirrors) they truly relish seeing their image.  I was overwhelmed with requests to take their photo once they trusted me and I was again humbled by the opportunity to connect even in this small way.

Interestingly the hardest part of visiting our children wasn’t trying to communicate with them or the inevitable feelings of guilt at the lifestyle we are able to live and how little we feel we might be doing for others.

Outside looking in

The most difficult part was watching those who weren’t sponsored, or invited, watching our party over the wall with it’s crude security measures.

Rwanda, not exactly a luxury destination, but the most fabulous trip I’ve taken in a long time. For each of my children’s 10th birthdays I take them on a mommy & me trip. It’s more for me than them, am hoping they don’t get wise to me.  For my oldest daughter’s trip, she chose Paris, we bought shoes and ate chocolate. When it came time for my next child to choose his destination the ideal trip presented itself to us.  We have been supporters of Partners in Health for years, in fact my son has been accompanying me to their annual meetings for the last 2 years. When the opportunity came up to visit PIH and tour the medical center that we helped to build, he jumped at the opportunity.

I was shocked at how many of our well educated and well traveled friends were stunned that I would take a 9 year old child to Rwanda. The country does live in our collective memories as a place of horrors, and rightly so. However modern Rwanda is actually quite safe and is a fascinating place to visit. Unlike many other economically disadvantaged countries I’ve visited I never felt harassed or preyed upon in Kigali (the capital) or in any of the villages. Only once did a child announce “you give me some money”, I think it was the only english he knew (besides, “how old are you?” which I was asked repeatedly…and never answered). I’m not sure he wanted money as much as he just wanted to test out his english, and if someone gave him some cash, all the better.
Getting to Rwanda was easier than I thought it would be. We flew directly to Brussels from New York, as Rwanda was a Belgian Colony, many inbound flights originate from there. Ironically, the Brussels/Rwanda leg of the flight on Brussels Air was much more luxurious than the NY/Brussels leg on American Airlines. Hot food, comfortable seats and well dressed flight attendants speaking French, it didn’t really feel as if we were headed to a war torn african country.  We were lucky to have some inside help from Partners in Health in arranging a car and driver.  Our driver it turns out had been in the army and took amazing care of us.  Did we need him for safety?  No.  Did I feel better having a driver who knew the area and was looking out for us?  Yes.  We met many cute American girls living in Rwanda working for various NGO’s and charities, they all used public transportation and felt perfectly safe.

Over the next few weeks I’ll recount our trip, including some guest blogging by my son, he recounts it as a “life changing experience”.  Which is adorable, given that he’s just now turning 10, how much changing could his life have needed?

The holidays are upon us (according to WalMart and their jingly commercials) and I’ve been pondering what I’d like for Christmas this year.  I’m sure it will come as no surprise that all I want is a first class ticket somewhere, anywhere.  Since that is likely not going to appear in my stocking, I’ve been thinking about what I need to make a coach seat feel like a first class ticket to ride.  I’m leaving for Rwanda on Friday and unless my upgrade clears (not likely) I will be flying for roughly 24 hours in a cramped, miserable coach seat.  I know, I’m a whiner, but red-eyes in the back of the bus are miserable, and no one can deny that.

So, I have my eye on some fab items I saw on www.Magellans.com.  They come highly recommended by my favorite travel writer Wendy Perrin.  They look so appealing in fact that I’m considering treating myself to an early Christmas present.  Wendy swears by the self-inflating seat cushion.  I don’t know about you, but I’ve lost feeling in my nether regions more than once on a long flight.  This magical cushion supposedly makes you feel as if you’ve “flown on a cloud of air”.  My booty could use that.  The other downside to non-first class flying (one of many actually) is the nasty neck crick I always seem to get from trying to sleep sitting up.  Magellan also has the Inflatable Komfort Kollar (what’s with all the k’s?), anyhow, though it looks as if it is meant to be used by a whiplash victim, again Wendy swears by it.  Having spent enough flights with my head twisted in unnatural positions in a useless attempt at restful sleep, I’ll give the hospital looking collar (kollar?) a go.

Last but not least, I freeze on every flight.  First class or no, the plane is always too cold.  While trying not to fantasize about fully flat beds, free airplane socks and complimentary noise control headphones, I’m deciding between a Snuggie blanket (and my pride), just kidding, I have no pride, and the “Cabin Cuddler” from Magellan’s.

In addition to having been recommended by Wendy, who writes for Conde’ Nast and has done her fair share of travel, the “Komfort Kollar” has been positively reviewed by The Wall Street Journal (and who can’t trust them?).  So I think I’ll treat myself to a little early holiday cheer in the hopes of arriving in Rwanda in any condition to get something done.  Don’t feel like I’ve already bought myself everything you might  be considering gifting me, I could still use a first class ticket…somewhere…anywhere.

A little bit of obnoxious wisdom gleaned  from my small children just saved me $600, who knew they could be so useful?  We all know that kids have figured out that they can generally get what they want by continuing to ask the same question of mom, dad, babysitter, grandma, big sister, mom again, grandma again until finally someone just gives them what they want.  While this might be annoying, I’ve found it a brilliant lesson in persistence.

I’ve been busy making plans to take my 9 year old son to Rwanda.  Yes, it’s a long story, it’s a post I’m working on, just go with me.  Rwanda is not exactly a highly traveled destination.  JetBlue doesn’t go there, actually, almost no one does.  If you are flying from the US or Europe you get there by way of Belgium (Rwanda used to be a Belgian colony, french is the native tongue actually).

According to my online thesaurus, there is only one word you can use to describe luxury…luxury.  This makes it tough for me to find other ways to describe what this blog is about.  It isn’t about always staying at the Ritz (though I do prefer it, come on, who doesn’t?), it’s about great travel experiences with your family.

Luxury has a different definition for everyone.  Luxury to me is taking a hot shower with no little friends “helping” me.  Luxury to my husband is time to spend with his family.  Luxury to my children often involves candy, and it isn’t the expensive kind.

According to the dictionary luxury is defined as “something inessential but conducive to pleasure and comfort”.

I’m hoping to bring you travel stories, tips and tricks to help you and your family make the most of your precious family vacation time.